Date: November 30, 2020
Subject: Wisconsin completes canvass and certifies Biden as state winner
And so it goes. One more step forward for Joe Biden. One more shovelful of earth from Trump’s grave. Through his rampaging hubris—his refusal to accept his decisive defeat—Trump is showing the entire world just how far one determined maniac will go to maintain his grasp on power and prestige. But when the end of his doomed gambit finally arrives, Trump will have accomplished an even more astounding feat—not only will he have dug his own grave, but he will have publicly heaved himself bodily into it and buried himself with his bare hands. More enjoyable with popcorn and a cold drink!
Date: November 27, 2020
Subject: Federal appeals court denies Rudy’s effort to revive lawsuit against Pennsylvania alleging discrimination against Trump
When a malignant tyrant entrusts his unjust cause to the championship of an unhinged, incomprehensible sack of codswallop and assclown of cosmic proportions… THE UNIVERSE CLAPS BACK.
November 25, 2020
Subject: Jenna Ellis tweets photo of “Warrior” Trump
Warrior? Nay! This narcissistic, malignant mass of bronzer-tinted flesh is the world’s oldest, grossest sexual predator, here demonstrating his signature attack—buttfucking the American people. And a true warrior would never yield to bone spurs. Just sayin’.
November 22, 2020
Subject: Team Trump requests second recount of Georgia’s Presidential election ballots
They can deny the truth and continue to try to change the outcome again…and again…and again. It will be to no avail. The Universe has made its ruling.
November 17, 2020
Subject: Rudy Giuliani, Pres. Trump’s personal attorney, has filed papers to appear on behalf of the Trump campaign in the federal election lawsuit filed in Pennsylvania.
Giuliani is a perfect example of how unchecked ego, whoring for relevance, failure, and Stage 6 dementia mix to create a volatile cocktail of fucktard.
November 16, 2020
Subject: Trump tweets, “I won the Election!” while Twitter begs to differ
Ugh. This shit again? Too disgusted to repost. Just click here.
November 16, 2020
Subject: Michigan governor Gretchen Whitmer slams Trump COVID adviser’s “rise up” comments
Scott Atlas tells Trump supporters in Michigan to “rise up” against Governor Whitmer and her restrictive measures to fight COVID-19.
The United States Code (Title 18) responds: “Sedition!” (Sedition: The act of inciting revolt against a lawful authority with the goal of overthrowing it.)
Atlas publicly signaled Michigan’s cadre of gun-toting whiners who refuse to help ease the spread of COVID to stage an armed insurrection against the state government. This is the bloody, harsh reality of politics in Trumpworld: Those who offend the oligarch are subject to violent removal from office.
November 15, 2020
Subject: Ivanka Trump chastises media for its “near total silence about the physical violence being perpetrated against conservatives”
You are correct. Violence is wrong. But we wonder: Did you take a similar stand when George Floyd and Breonna Taylor were murdered by police? Did you rail against violent white supremacists when one opened fire in a church? Did you openly decry the killer of Heather Heyer? IF NOT:
November 15, 2021
Subject: If two things are the same, how can one be different?
Why can Republicans believe that a record turnout of Trump supporters seeking to keep their leader in power can garner their candidate 74.22M votes, yet not accept that a record turnout of Joe Biden supporters, all seeking to displace Trump, could propel the Democratic candidate to victory with 81.28M votes? On November 3, 2020, 159.63M Americans voted for the candidate of their choice, establishing the largest voter turnout in US history and the first time more than 140 million people voted. When measured as a percentage of the eligible voting population, the 66.7% voter turnout in 2020 was the highest in 120 years!
What could possibly have accounted for this, do you suppose? Could some powerful necessity have been the cause? And why do Republicans assume that only they have a lock on generating groundswell support for their candidate?
November 15, 2020
Subject: Trump supporters at Million MAGA March protest over “stolen” election
Remember how, in the 1930’s, Hitler spewed lies and hate against Jews, and the German people believed every word? We wonder what the easily beguiled MAGA drongos will do come 12 noon on January 20, 2021 when reality descends upon them like the fist of an angry god.
[UPDATE January 6, 2021: Given today’s heinous events, this observation is remarkably prescient!]
November 14, 2020
Subject: What right-wingers need to learn about science
During this dreadful and deadly pandemic, now would probably be a good time to remind all the far-right conservatives, religious evangelicals, and white supremacists who devoutly worship Donald Trump and live upon his every word (aka MAGAngsters)— and like him, reject the leadership role of science and medicine to combat disease—of this:
If, as they believe, “God” created the Universe, then naturally, “God” created everything that comprises the Universe: Black holes, stars, planets, oceans, forests; and beasts great and small, and those who are evolved—or simply believe they are—above them. Yet if all these splendors spanning the Universe were created by God, then so too must have been the science that holds the Universe together, to bring it the structure and process that allow it to function without collapsing under remorseless, inevitable entropy. This is the science that gave birth to this paltry world and all life upon it, including you nattering fleshlings.
To conclude: Humans only discovered science. God created it—for humans to discover in their time and use for their benefit. To disrespect science is to disrespect God.
The MAGAngsters need to accept this and stand aside so science can drive plans to defeat and rebuild from COVID-19 without further impediments. If they won’t, then the country must recognize them for what they are—hucksters and pretenders, perpetrating a fraud, who weaponize religion to attain their personal and political agendas. Let them be branded as blasphemers. Perhaps only then will true leaders and those of true faith have the courage to dispel these self-serving, self-righteous obstructionists from their bully pulpits, discredit their lies, and jumpstart the healing America desperately needs.
November 14, 2020
Subject: Congresswoman-elect Marjorie Taylor Greene says “masks are oppressive” as U.S. breaks record for daily COVID-19 cases
Dear Congresswoman-elect Taylor Greene:
Allow me to correct your misguided pronouncement. Masks are an inconvenience. A ventilator is oppressive! Luckily for you, you’d neverfeel oppressed while using one, because, you know, you’d be too busy being unconscious and trying to breathe to notice.
If you do not understand the difference between the two concepts, try this simple test. Wear a mask for one hour while you walk freely in public. Then, use your congressional clout to wrangle permission from Washington Hospital Center to be hooked up to a ventilator while lying motionless in an ICU ward. For five minutes. Compare.
Would you drive your car without wearing your seatbelt because the belt felt oppressive? How about sail without a lifejacket? Travel to developing countries without inoculations against hepatitis, typhoid, and malaria? Or go to the gym without a sports bra?
Feeling lucky, are you? Or do you do what’s right to protect yourself?
A mask is nothing more than a face condom. It prevents strange bodily fluids from entering your body unbidden and your unwanted bodily fluids from entering every strange body you encounter. That’s a good thing.
Most routine activities that you can do without a mask (with the welcome exception of smoking)—work, shop, hike, visit family, attend church services, see a movie, get a haircut—you can just as easily do while wearing one. That includes being a responsible American citizen and member of Congress. Otherwise, you may soon find yourself oppressed by a ventilator, or possibly by something even worse—a coffin.
And despite how inconvenienced or “oppressed” you think a mask makes you feel, keep these details in mind:
Not wearing a mask puts you at risk of infection even if others wear masks. Masks can only mitigate the spread of the virus, not contain it completely. People can get careless and take their masks off while in public—perhaps to talk, or to cough, sneeze, belch, take a breath, or hork a loogie—and so contaminate an area. Plus, not everyone who, like you, refuses to wear a mask in public is necessarily COVID-free. You cannot demand medical records from them, so how would you know for certain the status of their health? Still sure you want to take the chance of not wearing a mask in their vicinity?
The people you encounter in public need to feel safe from you. Showing no symptoms doesn’t mean you’re healthy. Asymptomatic carriers can spread the virus (that is a hard fact). And regardless if you have tested negative, you still need to wear a mask. Whatever you know or believe does not translate to security for others; they have a right to feel safe in your presence and to know that you are doing your part during the pandemic to keep them safe.
Wearing a mask is as much about protecting and respecting the people around you as it is about protecting yourself. So if you choose not to respect yourself, then at least respect those around you. Wear a mask!
November 14, 2020
Subject: Trump taps Rudy Giuliani to lead post-election legal attacks
Wow! That’s like—let’s see—naming:
- Betsy deVos as Sec. of Education
- Gilligan as Commander of the US Pacific Fleet
- Ted McCarrick as altar boy instructor
- Jim Levenstein as judge of a pie baking contest
- Boris Badenov as Chief of Moose-and-Squirrel-Catching Department
November 10, 2020
Subject: Republican senators dodge reporter’s question on whether they have yet congratulated President-elect Joe Biden.
See the minions of Trumpworld.
See the minions of Trumpworld run.
See the minions of Trumpworld run from the truth.
See the minions of Trumpworld run from the truth while fueled by denial.
See the potential future of America.
See America weep.
November 10, 2020
Subject: Secretary of State Mike Pompeo ignores 2020 election results and smugly asserts “There will be a smooth transition to a second Trump administration.”
Let the fools play their hands in the courts. The truth, as is its wont, will out. When Trumpworld falls there will be no spoils for its predatory lackeys to feast upon but bitter tears and dust. Come 1/20/21, Secretary Pompeo, for his complicity, should be arrested and tried for treason.
November 10, 2020
Subject: What to do prior to moving into their new home
As the Bidens work toward their transition into the White House, I am wondering if Jill Biden has yet considered fumigating the place before she and Joe officially take residence. In fact, after four years of the Trumps’ malefic presence, as well as their morally malodorous inner circle and allies, the presidential mansion is very likely in desperate need of a thorough decontamination by an experienced hazmat service! [Back to Jan. 16, 2021]
November 9, 2020
Subject: Will Trump’s tenure on Twitter soon end?
Now that the Trump-era is grinding down to dust, Twitter should finally be held accountable for maintaining double standards in its policies that enabled and protected Donald Trump for the last three years and ten months. Most virulent trolls who use Twitter to spew incendiary remarks that include—but are not limited to—white supremacy, racism, misogyny, and calls for violence (on BLM protesters, Democratic governors, the media, poll workers, etc.) are suspended or even banned from the platform under Twitter’s Code of Conduct. But other tweets that violate that same policy are permitted to stay online if they are posted by world leaders and have a “clear public interest value” (value being a fluid quality as determined by Twitter leadership, of course).
However, as of 1/20/21, Trump will no longer be a “world leader.” He’ll just be yet one more unhinged private citizen with low intelligence; a spleenful of rage for human beings he fears and distrusts; and a public platform through which to spread his ignorance. If you can’t do the math, that means Twitter can shut down ex-President Trump permanently when (not if) he tweets to spread hate or incite violence. The question remains open as to whether or not Jack Dorsey has the balls to do it. Users who tweet respectfully, as well as educators, churches, civil rights advocates, scientists, and healthcare professionals have two months to petition Dorsey to ensure that he does. They need to hold him accountable to the governing policies of his company.
Let us hope that Dorsey and his leadership team adhere to their policy next year and do indeed treat Citizen Trump like any other vile, cancerous troll that infects the platform with its hateful screed by shuttering his account without warning or chance of appeal. Allowing Trump the keys to continuous, unabated access to Twitter, and tacit permission to weaponize the platform against his myriad political and personal enemies, is detrimental to the well-being of his targets and the integrity of America itself.
Trump has usurped the role of Twitter as a community social media platform by converting it into a bully pulpit—or worse, a dictator’s podium—to spread his lies, unfounded claims of criminality, and endless conspiracy theories, as well as to provoke violence nationwide in order to foment his corrupt vision of America: a White nationalist, immigrant-free, Christian patriarchy.
The time is long past due for Twitter to silence the mad ravings of Donald Trump. Allowing him any further opportunity to voice a hate that divides America is simply unacceptable. Come next January 20, Mr. Dorsey and his team will have a chance to prove their mettle. For America’s sake, they will need to find the strength to confront he who was most recently the most powerful man on Earth…and not blink. Or shirk from duty. Shutting down such a malignant account and banning Trump for life will cause inevitable and intense fallout from his rabid supporters, but such is the necessary cost Twitter must bear when placing people over profits—and reputation. We will soon learn which the company values more.
[UPDATE January 8, 2021: Twitter permanently banned Trump from its platform today after he incited a mob attack on the US Capitol Building two days ago. How unthinkable that this action only took place not just in the wake of such violence, but violence intended to overthrow the United States government and injure and murder its elected officials. Trump was a recognized agitator of radicalized right-wing nationalists during his entire presidency and should have been removed from Twitter long before today. Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey bears responsibility for the January 6 attack as much as Trump for instigating it and the mob that executed it.]
November 7, 2020
Subject: History has the last word
In the future, writers of history will disavow Trump. He will be stripped of his current title; Joe Biden will be retroactively named 45th President. As a reminder to the nation of the corrupt leadership of 1/2017 – 1/2021, Trump will be officially designated 1st US Dictator.
November 7, 2020
Subject: Trump defiantly tweets: “I WON THIS ELECTION, BY A LOT!”
Message to Donald Trump: Wrong! You lost, you horrible, immoral, paranoid, delusional, corrupt, racist lump of bronzer-tinted malignant human flesh. Take your loss like the “hard man” you pretend to be. Be gracious in defeat. Leave your honored office with a shred of dignity! [Back to Nov. 1]
November 7, 2020
Subject: Joe Biden reaches 270 electoral votes, is presumptive president-elect
To all Americans:
Now is not the time to give in to baser instincts.
Be humble in victory; gracious in defeat. Set the tone for your country for the next four years.
November 6, 2020
Subject: Joe Biden, Super Genius
For Biden to have executed all the complicated criminal maneuvers Trump and his MAGAngstas accuse him of masterminding to “steal” the election, he would need to have the intellect of an evil genius on the order of Lex Luther. Joe’s a sharp guy, but c’mon…think this through.
November 6, 2020
Subject: Stephen Colbert attacks Trump’s victory speech in Friday monologue
Every American needs to watch this. Stephen dissects Trump’s unhinged harangue with the aplomb of a 4th-year medical student. Trump stood before his countrymen and brazenly exposed himself as America’s dictator. Doesn’t America fight dictators?
November 5, 2020
Subject: Trump gives second speech claiming victory and flagging conspiracies
Just one more reason why this corrupt charlatan of an American president is unfit for the honored office he holds. As if there were not enough damning reasons screaming a clarion call for that role to end today. And someone in Trump’s inner circle needs to school the chump on constitutional and election laws so he can stop embarrassing himself—and by extension, America—live on video broadcast around the globe.
November 4, 2020
Subject: He’s the Rx America needs now
America’s got a fever. And the only prescription is more cowbell—pardon—Biden!
November 4, 2020
Subject: Trouble in Trumpworld
A burning, unwelcome irritation is spreading across Trumpworld today like an infectious jock itch. It’s a blue rash worming into the moist nether regions of the profoundly deluded and corrupt. The only cure is to abandon the source of the infection.
November 4, 2020
Subject: Subdued Trump
Time: 3:50 am
Did anyone else catch how muted Trump was during his speech earlier? Was it a case of nerves in the face of the poll numbers he’s seeing this morning? Or is he just up way past his bedtime?
November 4, 2020
Subject: Trump wants to pick and choose his votes
Time: 3:40 am
Trump wants all votes counted in Nevada and Arizona where he’s currently behind, but not in Georgia, Michigan and Pennsylvania where he currently leads. That speaks strongly to the integrity of this man who seeks to continue to lead the American people.
November 4, 2020
Subject: Norah O’Donnell tweet
Time: 3:19 am
Per CBS News: “CBS News’ Norah O’Donnell says Trump was “castrating the facts” when he made a series of false claims about the results of the 2020 election in an address to supporters early Wednesday.”
The Curator says: What she said. Just one more reason why this corrupt charlatan of an American president is unfit for the honored office he holds. And one more reason why that role should end today.
November 4, 2020
Subject: Millions of votes left uncounted in Pennsylvania
Time: 3:06 am
Election officials in western Pennsylvania have stopped counting votes for the night. Counting will begin at 10 am. Philadelphia has counted only about 50% of its votes. The state has no clear winner yet. TRUMP IS LYING.
November 4, 2020
Subject: No clear winner yet in three battleground states
Time: 2:59 am
Officials in Georgia, Michigan, & Pennsylvania have not completed counting votes. And the uncounted votes exceed the votes Trump now holds over Biden in those states. This election is not over.
November 4, 2020
Subject: Trump speaks to supporters and lies about election results
Time: 2:48 am
Trump just finished his speech, and what is clear is that its sole purpose was to sow dissent among his supporters in the event he loses the election. Voting is over in America. However, the physical counting of votes—both those cast yesterday and the millions of mail-in ballots many states have yet to start to count—may continue for days.
November 4, 2020
Subject: Post-Election Day chaos
Time: 1:53 am
Trump has promised to speak to his supporters this morning, but is currently a no-show. That’s because he’s now locked in the Presidential Bathroom warming the tiles in a fetal position.
November 2, 2020
Subject: Election Day 2020
In the wake of Tuesday’s election, in the tantalizingly not-so-distant future, books will be published on Trump, his inner circle, his political allies, and the delusions they shared on America and its core values. The most famous will be: Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children.
November 1, 2020
Subject: Election Day 2020
Be sure to vote on Tuesday! The time has come to evict the bad tenants occupying the property located at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW in Washington, DC.
November 1, 2020
Subject: Election Day 2020
When you are out to vote on Tuesday—heading to a polling place; standing in line; going home–sing the song below to let your fellow Americans know WHY you’re voting and WHY that’s so crucial this year.
Tip: Sing in Trump’s voice for greater effect!